Swine Flu…

One of the things that has been getting a lot of attention lately is that Swine Flu. They want me to write about it, but I shall refuse every demand to write about this blown out of proportion pig flu. The WHO ? people say that this is a Level 5 6 “Pandemic”. Basically this means, we’re all going to die.

But why would I write about a flu that has killed: 170 7 165 2 171 people in Mexico and that and has: 200 3 54 20 60 confirmed cases in the U.S?

Because is just preposterous!!! Writing about how bad is going to get will cause fear. The media has taken this flu into an out of control Chaos! I mean soon I will not be surprised to watch this kind of signs:

And that’s not all. Then we’ll start watching stuff from the news like: “THE FLU FROM HELL!” Causing panic and making people kill each other.

So yeah we do have to be safe with our surroundings and yes this is a real deal, but why make it such a Chaotic Deal?

Do I really want to write about that? No sir!

Cycle-T’s Yearly Fursuit Review (PART 1)

It’s that time again, folks. That’s right, it’s that special time of year in which we all come together as a community and bear witness to that fabulous and luxurious lifestyle choice: being a gender confused man who likes to dress up as an animal and have sex with other people who do the same.

This year, we’ve had a tough choice in finalists, as well over ten-thousand participants entered their name into the ring to be crowned “Mr and/or Mrs Human/Animal of the Year”. The competition was tough, and only through trials, tribulations, and much consummation of alcohol and weed were we able to narrow the candidates down to these lucky finalists. Each contestant was graded on the “Four P’s”: poise, panache, presence, and popularity. What follows is the review of our panel of judges, followed by the entrant’s scores. Gentlemen, start your engines!

North American Red Fox

Now let’s get started. Here we see Mr. Gerald Cunningham representing the wayward and often shy species known as the Red Fox. Mr. Cunningham has built quite a nice suit for himself, showcasing just how difficult the competition was this year. We see the fox’s fur coloration is spot on and is what one would expect to see in the wild. Unfortunatly, we had to take points off for the chic brown mullet, as the typical North American red fox does not possess one naturally. The filthy floral shirt and black stretch pants are also not normally found on foxes in the wild. Finally, we had to remove a few points for the location, as the North American red fox does not typically live in France in front of the Eiffel Tower.

Poise:    7      Panache:     8       Presence:     7.5     Popularity:     6.6

Overall Score: 7.2

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North American Caribou

The reindeer (Rangifer tarandus), also known as the caribou when wild in North America, is an Arctic and Subarctic-dwelling deer, widespread and numerous across the northern Holarctic. This, ….uh… creation comes to us from the mind of Josh Linkweldt.

Although the coloration of this reindeer suit work quite well with that of the natural pelt found in the wild, the uhhh, choice of leather dominatrix straps and the long, flowing wing give us a sense of… uh…

Anyway, here are Mr. Linkweldt’s scores.

Poise:    6      Panache:     5       Presence:     5.3     Popularity:     4.9

Overall Score: 5.3

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Orca (Killer Whale)

Entering into our “Aquatica” category this year is Mr. Humphry Dewart’s Killer Whale. The killer whale or orca, less commonly, is the largest species of the dolphin family. Mr. Dewart’s latex… suit… exemplifies the spot-on coloration that we have come to expect in our “Aquatica” contestants. The… zipper and the dominatrix mask is a bit off putting, as well as the, uh… protrusion…

Uhh…

Poise:    5.9      Panache:     5.6       Presence:     3.3     Popularity:     3.9

Overall Score: 4.6
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That’s all for this week of Cycle-T’s Yearly Fursuit Review. Stay tuned as we bring you the the best of the rest!

Lindsay Lohan is Really Fat

Here are some pictures of Lindsay Lohan in a bikini that will make you lose her appetite. From some of the angles, she almost looks invisible. What pisses me off most about the photos as even though she looks like a malnutrioned Ethiopian kid, she’s still got huge boobs. Life isn’t fair.

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Mel Gibson Makes Me Sick

I hope Mel Gibson’s career will go the way of the Dodo… AKA Britney Spears circa 2007.  Only this time I will not be rooting for a comeback.

His divorce isn’t even final and he is stepping out with his ‘mistress’ Oksana Grigorieva. He showed up at the X-Men Origins: Wolverine screening in L.A. on 4/28/2009 holding hands with that plastic faced musician.

He has about 400 children. His first job in the entire world is to be a good parent. How is this behavior going to affect his children’s lives?

It shows how truly low brow he is. Money doesn’t give someone class, and I hope his wife puts him through the ringer.

I wonder if they enjoyed X-Men Origins: Wolverine or maybe they were to busy canoodleing.

Bored? Missing the 90’s?

Why not spend some time watching The Dana Carvey Show on Hulu?

In the very first episode Dana Carvey announces that the show will be an attempt to bring ‘alternative comedy’ to parents who can’t stay up after 10 o’clock…. perhaps that is why it was cancelled after eight episodes. This show gets away with some pretty extreme content for 9:30pm on ABC. The other incentive to check this out is the shows writing staff: Dana Carvey, Charlie Kaufman, Dave Chappelle, Stephen Colbert and Steve Carell. Colbert and Carell even make frequent appearances on the show. Remember this is 1996 and no one knows why the heck they are…

Check it out, it is definitely better than watching new episodes of SNL:

http://www.hulu.com/the-dana-carvey-show

by the way: I got the tip to watch from /film.. visit their great site here.

Paris Hilton Receives Celeb of the Year Award

Yes, you read that title right. Paris Hilton, the queen of getting paid to do nothing, received a celebrity of the year award for the success of her fragrances and will be officially recognized at the 2009 FiFi awards. Because a celebrity of the year award is exactly what Paris Hilton needs. I can just imagine her acceptance speech–”This award is sooooo hot.”

Eagle Eye meets I love Money!

MTV premiered this week: “The Phone!” from executive producer: “Justin Timberlake”. I ussually don’t meddle in these kinds of things… oh who am I kidding? I love all these crazy new shows. Specially with “amazing” names such as this one (please note the sarcasm).

So what Is the Phone? Well the video should have gave you a pretty good idea, but I’ll sum it up in a easy phrase (which happens to be the title of this story).

The Phone = Eagle Eye Movie + I Love Money!(VH1)

Very simple. This new “reality” (make emphasis on the “”) game show is a remake of the Eagle Eye movie using Actors (I mean “real” people) and if they do everything this weird guy tells them on the phone, they win $50,000! How nice! They choose 4 “complete strangers” and make them do ridiculous stunts and acts in order to save the world from a fake bomber who apparently can move from place to place in the blink of an eye..or more accurately a flip phone closing and opening…

You know what I would do with the money? Well Nothing, because I’ll have to give it all to my student Loan. My question to all is…Do we really need another show like this?  According to Many viewers this is based of a game show in the Netherlands who did the exact same thing and then sold the show idea to MTV here in the US. However, is not about buying the idea from the Dutch, is just that do we really need another “Reality” TV show?

I don’t know, I guess we’ll just have to wait and see…

Obsession

I was hanging out with my Mom, and she is obsessed with Dancing With The Stars.  It is actually the only show she watches.  And finally I am glad I was watching it.  There was this scene where the guys did the Beyonce “Put a ring on it” dance.  I was cracking up so hard.  Any guy doing that dance is hysterical.   I am glad my Mom made me watch it.   Her obsession is dancing has-bins.

My obsession is The IT Crowd.  You won’t find the men on that show dancing like Beyonce… well not yet anyway. The IT Crowd is the most brilliant show I have seen in a really long time.  It plays on Channel 4 in England, but you can buy a whole season off of iTunes for $11.  This show is so funny on many different levels.   Watch this clip and be amazed.

Please please please watch it and become fans.   A little background: Moss and Roy are IT geeks.  Jen knows nothing about computers but is the head of their department. “Well if it’s ok with the Hawk….”  Love this show.

Are Microsoft a Bunch of Pansies?

Now that we have all gotten in touch with our feminine sides, it is time for a manly post:

Well, we all know that Vista had one of the poorest launches in recent memory. Microsoft rushed it out so that they could better compete with Apple and their hip advertisements. For this reason, the quiet doubt monster that lives in the brains of many a computer user is grumbling at the forthcoming launch of Windows 7. He does achieve a bit of tranquility from the screen shots which are beginning to flood the world wide web though:

Yes, we have to admit.. it looks pretty neat! In addition to these pretty ahem I mean, macho screens, CrunchGear recently reported that Windows 7 is going to be capable of running XP… To me this says one thing: Microsoft is scared of another disaster. What a bunch of pansies.

Estrogen Out Reach Program.

As part of The Mug Show’s diversity plan of ‘09, they have also asked me to be a writer on this show. Barbara and I are part of their estrogen outreach program.  As for me, you may call me Andirun.  Don’t ask how I got the name… only a select few know my true identity, and they have sworn to secrecy.   Actually that’s not true.  They call me Andirun because my real name will make your head explode.  I hope I will be the nice contributor on here.  I can’t promise you anything… but I will try.

On that note almost every movie preview I have seen in the last month is total crap. Seriously who goes and watches that tripe.

There is one movie I am completely psyched to see.  Its called Paper Heart.  It has Charlyne Yi and Michael Cera.  I am a huge Michael Cera fan. I have loved his brand of comedy since I first saw him as George-Michael.  I am excited because its sort of a documentary but not. Go to apple trailers today and get a clue on what you are missing out on.

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